Saturday, November 21, 2009

WORK911 Ezine - What's New, Ready For Holidays, Fighting Fair, Gift Ideas For Information Junkies, Huge Announcement About New Search Engines For Training, Development, Learning, Management, Leadership, Webdesign, Freebies

Nov. 20, 2009 What's New, Ready For Holidays, Fighting Fair, Gift
Ideas For Information Junkies, Huge Announcement About New Search
Engines For Training, Development, Learning, Management, Leadership,
Webdesign, Freebies.

We focus on the upcoming holidays, preparing for and dealing with
holiday conflict, share with you a new project that will really help
you find QUALITY, NO SPAM NO JUNK websites and content, and quite a
bit more. Let's get going.

Holidays Coming: Are You Prepared For The Interpersonal Challenges?

It's that time again. Holidays are coming in a number of countries and
faiths, and that means families getting together, and (theoretically)
enjoying each others' company. Except family togetherness often brings
out various dynamics that tend to increase the potential for conflict
and hurt feelings. The pressure of preparing for holidays doesn't help
either, and anyone spending time in shopping malls this time of year
will understand. Work and economic concerns are also making people
tense and volatile.

NOW is the time to start honing your skills regarding how you deal
with conflict, because it's almost inevitable they will be needed over
the next few months. We have some tools for you

First up is something for the entire family: Our Learning To Fight
Fair Helpcard. NOW is an ideal time to purchase your copy (it's just
about $10) and share it with your family, or even use it to construct
some rules to apply for the holiday season on how to act when there
are disagreements. Check out our page at: http://busylearners.com/products/i-cfightfair.htm
for more information, and buy it now because if you wait until just
before holidays to get your spouse and kids onboard, it will be too
late.

If you want to be able to have the family argue or disagree without
hurting each other, and so the fallout doesn't extend on and on, get
this learning tool. You are worth it. So are your loved ones. Have a
better holiday season.

Next up is Using Your Head To Manage Conflict Helpcard. When conflict
occurs, or begins, at work or at home, people tend to REACT to it
automatically in their preferred style, and don't think through their
reactions to choose what fits the situation. One thing we know about
conflict is that HOW you choose to behave will determine if things
work out well, or poison relationships. Another is that the more you
think and choose the best solution for the situation, the better off
you will be.

Using Your Head to Manage Conflict Helpcard explains your options. For
example, some potential conflicts truly deserve to be totally ignored,
while others may require strong, even aggressive actions. Other
situations need a light cooperative hand. We teach you when to use
what techniques, and that's invaluable. For just about $11, it's a
steal. http://busylearners.com/products/i-cconhead.htm

PS. Buy both of these helpcards at the same time and you get a
discount. Available in immediate downloadable versions, OR, in
attractive laminated items shipped to you via regular mail. To view
ALL our learning tools go to http://busylearners.com .

FEATURED ARTICLE: DEALING WITH HOSTILE BAIT

Another aspect of dealing with conflict, or verbal barbs, subtle or
otherwise has to do with dealing with the "bait". Ok. The bait isn't
worms, or anything like that, but the idea is this: If you "bite" into
the verbal bait, then it tastes bad and you get hooked into a
conversation that usually goes downhill and escalates.

In this Robert Bacal article from the archives, he provides some
methods to deal with the bait, taken from his book Defusing Hostile
Customers Workbook. http://busylearners.com/products/i-defuse.htm

They are applicable to many other situations, but with the holidays
coming, those of you who deal with customers may want to look
carefully at this.

Dealing With Hostile "Bait" by Robert Bacal

When dealing with verbal abuse or hostility from clients, it is
important to be able to avoid responding to the "bait" that is placed
before you. Not only is that important, but it is also important to
know exactly what you can say, when you are subject to attacks like: 

"If you really cared about my welfare, you would give me my check!" 

"You guys in government are lazy and over-paid." 

"I bet if I wasn't [ethnic group], you would give me...." 

In this On The Line, we will help you deal with these kinds of
remarks. 

Some Background 

In order to deal with these kinds of attacks there are a few things
that you need to understand. 

Verbal attacks follow certain patterns, and have some hidden
rules. The attacker expects you to react in particular ways. Usually a
verbal attacker will expect that you will become either defensive and
intimidated, or that you will become aggressive and attack
back. Unfortunately, when you do what the attacker suggests, you give
control to him or her, and increase the probability that the attack
will continue. So, the best way to stop an attack is not to take
either of these actions. 

In addition, verbal attacks tend to "run off" by themselves, in an
almost automatic manner. So long as you do what is expected, the
attacker is able to continue. So, you need to do something unexpected
to stop the attack. 

Also, verbal attacks contain bait. Just like the fisherman, the
attacker presents you with bait in the hope that you will swallow it
and be hooked. Bait is often unsaid, or pre-supposed. What this means
is that the attacker need not attack you directly, but need only imply
certain things, without really saying anything. Let's take an
example. 

In the attack sentence "If I wasn't [ethnic group], I bet you would
give me....". If you look carefully, you won't find the insult in the
words. Still, most people will react to the hidden bait...the implied
suggestion of racism. It is important to be able to identify the
hidden attack, so you can understand, and resist the attacker's effort
to manipulate you. 


Self-Defense Tactics 

Dealing with these kinds of attacks can be complex, but we can suggest
a few options that are likely to disrupt the attack. 

1. The Disrupting Question 

The general principle underlying this technique is that you want to do
something somewhat unexpected, while at the same time, acknowledging
the implied insult. It is important not to defend and not to be too
passive. 

The disrupting question follows the following form: 

When did you start thinking that....? 

where the end of the question relates to the unspoken insult or
attack. For example, faced with the attack implying racism, disrupting
questions might be: 

When did you start thinking that we allow your ethnic background to
influence our behaviour? 

When did you start thinking that I am discriminating against you? 

Both of these questions are likely to cause the attacker to become a
bit confused and have to stop the attack so that he or she can figure
out what to say next. This kind of response brings control back to
you. In addition, these questions acknowledge, and respond to the
issue brought up by the customer in a polite way. 


2. Computer Mode 

An attacker will often expect you to respond using an "I" statement
(eg. I'm not racist), or a "You" statement (eg. "You can't talk to me
that way"). 

You have a third option, that involves doing the unexpected. This
option involves using what we call "computer mode" because it is
somewhat detached, and removes the personalization from the attack. It
does not involve I or You statements. 

Some forms to remember include: 

"It's interesting that some people think that [their ethnic background
affects the way they are treated]." 

"A good many people think that [government employees are over-paid]" 

Note again that these responses will be unexpected by the attacker,
and while they show that you heard the attack, they do not imply that
you agree, or that your are defending or attacking. 


Conclusion: 

We have described two simple verbal responses to verbal attacks that
tend to interrupt the attack cycle. Of course, there are other
techniques that can be used, and it is important to realize that any
attack defusing techniques must be applied with care and good
judgement, since every situation is different. These techniques,
coupled with others, can result in increasing your ability to deal
with the hostile bait. 

---

News & Updates:

1) We have a huge announcement to make for those of you interested in
material on:

management

leadership

training & development and learning

webdesign

Our current project, which is now online, involves creating a set of
powerful niche search engines that help weed out spam, junk, bait and
switch and other poor quality results. Our goal is to make it easy and
fast to find what you need. More on this next issue (which should be
next week), but check this out. Go to http://researchprofessional.org.
Development is ongoing, but I think you'll be amazed how quickly and
efficiently you can find what you need in these topic areas. More
topics coming!

2) We are in the process of cleaning out old outdated entries and
links in our articles databases. We have completed a number of
cleanups, including at http://articles911.com , http://customerservicezone.com,
http://work911.com/leadership-development, and others. That should
reduce some of the frustration associated with using these parts of
our sites. We continue to clean up the databases.

Looking for Christmas Gifts For Information Junkies?

Some of my favorite things:

Audiobooks: I'm an audiobook junkie. They are great if you don't like
television, and you like to relax with your eyes closed or easily get
tired eyes, and quality these days is excellent. The leading supplier
of audiobooks in the world is audible, and they often have discounts.
Their system is efficient because you download the material and it's
playable on most players, including, of course the Ipod line and
Iphone. Great gifts, for others or yourself, AND there's a good supply
of fiction and non-fiction. Great for driving, flying, making use of
time otherwise wasted. Here's one of their offers:

Download an audiobook for $7.49 and save 50% for your first 3 months.
Choose from over 60,000 titles. 

If the link above doesn't work just go to http://www.jdoqocy.com/pi105zw41w3JLOOSKLLJLKOKKOMK

In the same topic area is audio book summaries. It's impossible to
keep up with all of the relevant professional books out there, so
Soundview summarizes books in relatively short audio files playable on
mp3 players, etc. Once again, huge saving of time, and huge potential
to make use of the time that normally goes to waste standing in line,
gardening, or doing other things that don't require a lot of mental
attention. Check them out:

http://www.anrdoezrs.net/28108tenkem1366A23313259A324 They have a
great offer. If you subscribe you'll receive 5 free popular book
summaries. Also a great gift that keeps on giving for the busy people
in your life thirsty for information.

Finally, we have some freebies, and they are also book summaries.
These are available for limited time only, so get them NOW.

The Myth of Multitasking: How 'Doing It All' Gets Nothing Done - Free
Book Summary:

In this summary you will learn:

* Why the idea that multitasking works is misleading *

How to deal with constant, active or passive interruptions at work *

How to use your time productively without "switchtasking"

Why you should read The Myth of Multitasking

Dave Crenshaw has managed to stretch a clear, simple concept into an
entire book, but it is a useful, helpful concept. Crenshaw debunks the
myth that multitasking can be effective and advocates focusing on one
task at a time instead. He teaches this lesson by telling the story of
a gifted business coach, Phil, and his stressed-out client, Helen. He
uses the format of a business novel to demonstrate that multitasking
is not an efficient way to get things done. Every time a person
changes from one task to another, which Crenshaw calls
"switchtasking," he or she loses time and focus. The remedy, the
author explains, is to cut down on interruptions, manage how you
allocate your time and concentrate on a single task at a time. This is
not exactly a groundbreaking theory in time management, but it is
certainly a helpful reminder. getAbstract suggests this book to
managers who must help employees handle their time and to people who
need guidance to quit multitasking so they can actually get things
done. About the Author Dave Crenshaw has coached business executives
for the past decade. A frequent keynote speaker, he founded the Fresh
Juice Strategy program. http://work911.tradepub.com/free/w_geta17/prgm.cgi

The Art of Engagement: Bridging the Gap Between People and
Possibilities - Free Book Summary: http://work911.tradepub.com/free/w_geta18/prgm.cgi

In this summary you will learn:

* Why your organization's new strategy will fail if your employees are
not engaged with it * What six obstacles impede employee engagement

* What are the six best ways to engage employees *

Why "strategic engagement" is a process, not a series of separate,
stand-alone actions

Why you should read The Art of Engagement

Organizational leaders spend considerable time and effort carefully
developing strategies to advance their corporate goals. However, they
often fail to communicate these strategies compellingly to their
employees – the people who must execute every step. Therefore, it is
no surprise that most such strategies fail. Management consultant Jim
Haudan recommends a strategy-sharing approach using visuals, metaphors
and stories to engage employees. He offers tactics for getting them on
board to execute your strategy and organizational directives. One
negative: Many of the illustrations (reductions from original table-
size artwork) are busy and even fuzzy. Some feature tiny text, which
illustrates – in the breech – Haudan's point about using clear visuals
to communicate and engage. Otherwise the book is superior, very
insightful and nicely written. Haudan uses case studies to demonstrate
the effectiveness of his employee engagement process. getAbstract
believes leaders can benefit from learning his tactics for
communicating strategies so employees understand them, support them
and actually implement them. http://work911.tradepub.com/free/w_geta18/prgm.cgi

Acing the Interview: How to Ask and Answer the Questions That Will Get
You the Job! - Free Book Summary:

In this summary you will learn:

* What prospective employers will ask you

* What you should answer and ask in return

* How to avoid common job interview mistakes

Why you should read Acing the Interview

You got fired. How do you handle that during a job interview? Or you
only spent a year at each of your last two jobs. How do you convince a
prospective employer that you will last? You work for a firm with a
great reputation, but you're not happy. What do you say when an
interviewer asks why you want to leave such a respected outfit? Job
placement and recruitment expert Tony Beshara provides the best
answers to these and other job interview questions. Plus, he explains
the questions you should ask before you accept a job offer. TV
psychologist Dr. Phil McGraw calls Beshara "the number one career
placement guy" in the U.S. If you're job hunting, he's the right
source for valuable job interview insights and information. Here, he
lists more than 450 typical job interview questions and suggested
answers. getAbstract recommends his savvy, comprehensive and helpful
book. Job seekers and interviewers alike will appreciate it.
http://work911.tradepub.com/free/w_geta16/prgm.cgi

Finally, More Free Stuff For GearHeads:

Receive Your Complimentary eBook NOW!

"A Computer Geek's Smart Productivity Guide" http://work911.tradepub.com/free/w_make02/

In this free twenty-paged PDF, you will find out the most common
productivity mistakes, as well as a number of applications to improve
your touch typing, your time organization, and your global workflow.

With all distractions that modern life brings, it's not easy to keep
your productivity up. Whether you're an enthusiastic procrastinator,
or just happen to have very little time at hand, there are a lot of
people who really can't afford to lose sight of business. However, by
playing your cards right, it would be well possible to get that little
productivity boost you're aching for. Know your do's and dont's, and
you'll be able to move more work in less time.

Although this eBook is primarily aimed at the computer geek, the
potential user base is far wider, as it comes packed with a lot of non-
digital tips and advice as well. With this free guide you will also
receive daily updates on new cool websites and programs in your email
for free courtesy of MakeUseOf. http://work911.tradepub.com/free/w_make02/

Twitter: Best Practices and Tips:

Even though half the universe is on Twitter these days, beginning out
of nothing isn't always that evident. If you really want your Twitter
to fly high, it doesn't end with just creating an account. Especially
with this many people on Twitter, it's important to know the tools
you're working with, and the dazzling reach of this innovating
technology. In over forty pages this guide tackles every Twitter
feature, tip and trick you can think of. Learn to work the interface,
to Tweet from your desktop, cool Twitter bots and which people to
follow. Download The Complete Guide to Twitter now. With this free
guide you will also receive daily updates on new cool websites and
programs in your email for free courtesy of MakeUseOf.
http://work911.tradepub.com/free/w_make01/prgm.cgi

BYE For Now

WoW, this issue is bigger than we thought, and we haven't even come
close to finishing up our news, offers and things, so we'll probably
see you all next week! It's been a good week. I accidentally found out
what a Turducken is? Do you know?

Our Sites:

Just a quick summary of our sites that have information on the
following topics:

World's Best Search Engines: http://researchprofessional.org

Training and Development Resource Center:http://thetrainingworld.com

Free Learning Stuff: http://free2thee.com

Small Business Resource Center: http://smallbusiness411.org

Small Business Blog (new material): http://smallbusiness411.org/wp/

Leadership Resource Center: http://work911.com/leadership-development/index.html

Communication Resource Center: http://www.work911.com/communication/index.htm

Conflict (both workplace and family) http://conflict911.com

Business, Strategic and Personal Planning: http://www.work911.com/planningmaster/index.html

Performance Management & Appraisal: http://performance-appraisals.org

Customer Service: http://customerservicezone.com

Our Main Site: http://www.work911.com

Multi-Purpose Articles Database: http://www.articles911.com

To new subscribers: The work911 newsletter is published no more than
once a week and contains articles on all things work related, and
contains other work related resources, and updates about our sites,
and their contents. Past history indicates we publish about every ten
days. Subscribe at http://work911.com/newsletter.htm

Don't forget that you can access free, useable previews of over twenty
of our books and helpcards at:

http://busylearners.com

and that we continue to offer special freebie offers and discounts to
our newsletter subscribers! (and our toolbar owners!)
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